Popping corn at 7 am

On to catching up...

This event occurred back in the middle of Dec 2012, but since it was in my drafts list, I still wanted to write about it.

On the morning of Dec 18th, I came downstairs to the smell of pop corn and a very accomplished child. My mind raced back and forth as to how to handle the situation. On the one hand, I was very impressed at E.'s autonomy, problem-solving strategies, and self-motivation. On the other, I was concerned about safety. I opted to praise his self-reliance and admire the humor of the situation, considering that the little kid probably had been dreaming about pop corn enough to wake him him. Very gently though, I expressed my concerns about his safety, especially at placing one small chair on top of the other. He understood that he could have fallen and hurt himself, but hopefully that did not negate how pleased I was to see him do something on his own. That is yet to be determined, as in the last six months he has not tried to do it again.

I loved this experience. My little boy is growing up and becoming more self-sufficient. It was impressive that the popcorn was perfect and he was careful to handle the hot bag. E. even got out the hot sauce and had one very tasty treat for breakfast!

I found this experience to be a perfect analogy for parenting. How are parents supposed to balance their influence while allowing their kids to try new things on their own? How does one praise courage and daring despite possible ailments with just enough caution to keep our little ones from harm? How do we assess risk, both short- and long-term? It is obvious that if E. had fallen, bumped his head, or burned himself, this experience would have been awful. My mind races through those collapsed potentials and I am so thankful that he was safe and sound and happily enjoying his treat. Maybe we ought to believe more that most times things turn out ok. I don't mean to throw caution to the wind, but maybe I ought to embrace risk a little more and let the possibility of harm be just that, one out of many outcomes.

I guess I fear too much. My actions are often bound by the believe that we are not untouchable, and I try hard not to tempt fate. But, is there something to be learned from this? Am I "keeping him safe" at the expense of nurturing a more confident child? Who would have imagined these are the thoughts that came to me that morning and six months later I still have not resolved them.

Happy daring child. I ought to let him, just a little bit more.